I've wanted a personal journal for...I don't know...probably a couple of years now. There is one thing preventing me from getting one: the horror of my mother reading the last journal I ever kept. It was circa early 2004 and had all the gory details of my then so called love life. Later I heard her discussing it with my dad. I'm sure you can imagine what I felt.

But a personal journal is nothing like a public one. Public journals remind me of the concept of 'citizen journalism'. There are so many things I would like to say that only I can appreciate, especially in the long term. How fantastic it is to look back and see what you were going through a few months/years ago. I started my first private diary at the age of 8, when I first came to Australia. The diary itself was a book bought from Clint's Crazy Bargains and I love that there is a very brief Wikipedia entry about the store. It was $1-2, had lots of pages and was the size of a small novel, with a hard red cover, a "Bram Stoker's Dracula" imprint and some fangs on it. It was, to my eight-year-old self, simply awesome.

And the thing with that journal was that while I started writing in Polish, somewhere in the middle of it I switched to English. It was tumultuous: there were entries where I wrote in English and rebelled and switched back, saying how much I hated the new language. Eventually it just became routine to write in English, like an extension of schoolwork but with a personal touch. It was around 1995 when I started writing in English, two years after coming to Australia. Other developments included reading the original Lassie (the love for animals was seemingly bred into me) and discovering that Mufti Day is actually an excuse to dress slutty. Apparently I resembled Little Bo Peep but I've so far managed to push that waaaaay to the back of my mind. *shudder*

The diary spanned years. It included my crush on R.N. (name withheld because you can find him on Facebook HAHA). He is now a firefighter - I secretly like StalkBook. It included a lot of feelings associated with growing up. The diary, however, is nowhere to be found! The last time I saw it was when I was putting it into a box for storage. It didn't turn up when I was unpacking the boxes later. I still hope that it's just hidden somewhere, that I couldn't find it because it was stuck between some novels. Otherwise...it's just too horrifying to think that the people who were storing it actually removed it, y'know?

Anyway, the point is that I would really like a journal again, but how on earth do I keep it private when I don't live alone? Appear inconspicuous and hide it under the mattress? Actually that might work... Whenever I look for a book worthy of it, I always think of the very first one I bought. In fact, despite all the books I've gone through since 1993, I wish that I'd find exactly the same Dracula one with the red hard cover. It reminds me of being eight years old, of wearing dark sunglasses and generally looking very cool, of having an open mind but being in a world where I didn't understand the language and where the kids acted strange. It reminds me of being able to read well, but not understand what I was reading and of impressing the Vietnamese kids in ESL class by memorising some Vietnamese sentences I came across in the school library.

What would Kurt Vonnegut say? Such is life.

This very nostalgic entry was sponsored by two glasses of cabarnet sauvignon. However, it says on the bottle that it is a product of Israel, so at least my ancestors would be proud of me. One can only hope.

I believe that an update is needed in the cat area.


Monkey was avoiding me for a few days due to a badly needed bath, but she appears to be coming 'round.

This pic was taken while I was reading and/or highlighting a Sociology study guide, by the way.

I got a haircut, but all the pics of me are very unphotogenic, so I'll spare you. ;)

<3

So...much...homework... So little motivation.

Dear brain, if you can focus long enough on Foucault, I'll let you watch True Blood.

I have a Twitter account. I think the username is distraction84. Feel free to 'follow'. Not too sure how it works yet, but all the major organisations seem to use it and I've been hearing about it being such a phenomenon for two years now, so I joined the flock. ;)

As I sat in class, surroundered by people who argued whether money is real or not, I wondered what the business classes were doing at the time.

<3

Standard memorial talk, but helpful nonetheless.

I went to the Michael Jackson memorial today. They gave everyone a single white glove at the entrance. :)

It was good to be in the company of MJ fans - old, young, all colours. Some crying, others talking about concert experiences. And some giggling at the 80s special effects on Thriller, which was playing on monitors, among other clips.

Good times last night, good times. Nothing like making out with a cute and bubbly blonde and dancing the night away.

(I can't dance.)
;)

I never got that mixture of danger and sex in movies...but I totally get it now.

Yay, Carlsberg!

There is but one way to ensure that I get up at the time that my alarm goes off, instead of just turning it off and going back to sleep. I must place the alarm far away from the bed, so that I'll have to get up in order to switch it off. Now, it's true, I can ignore the incessant ringtone for quite some time. But there is so long I can stand David Bowie's whiny voice at 9am.

That's right, people who work, I consider 9am to be an early time to wake up. Take that, you and your money!

And now to pseudo sleep!

P.S. Does my icon make me look like the hunchback of Notre Dame/Casper the friendly ghost?

Poll #1186508
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 4

Floral dresses rock. Y/N?

:D

A conversation with my brain. Who are you calling loco?

Brain: Dear Sarah, you have written half of the blasted essay in 2 days, with 4 days left to spare. You should seriously consider terminating the panic, because if you continue this awesome writing trend of yours you will finish the essay with 2 days left to spare! Also, remember your first year at uni, when you waited until the day before to start and finish an essay and you still passed.

Me: I don't want to just pass, I want a good mark, and if I don't get a good grade my options will close.

Brain: But you will still get a diploma.

Me: But I may not be able to transfer to Sydney, and probably not go on student exchange to a hot, Latin country.

Brain: It's not like you'll have the money to go to a hot, Latin country anytime soon.

Me: You're not being very supportive.

Brain: I'm being realistic.

Me: Exactly.

I am avoiding Sociology. But I'll get into it, right after I whore the cat.

( That just doesn't sound right. )

I got a little, fluffy kitten. You didn't think it was possible for me to get anything fluffy, did you? Heh It's a very cute little thing, a female, and it fits into the palm of my hand. Also, it's got the longest whiskers and adorable white eyeliner. You should see it run! It's this little awkward fluffball. It was a little freaked out in the photos I took, but it got a bit more acquainted now and is sitting on my lap and purring.

( Damn you, Pets Paradise, and your irresistable cats! )

LMFAO

Which Britney Spears are you? No One Understands You Britney Everyone hates you for a different reason. For someone so young you sure do have a lot of people who would like to see you dead.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

I bought a coffee strainer thing...for $12 *grumbles* which, in my current state, is apparently a lot of moneyz. And I know I said I'd stop with the "z's", but I lied. Liedz, even. Where was I? Oh, yes. So since the coffee strainer thing, I've been enjoying 3 delicious coffees a day. Imagine if I had an espresso machine! Oh, I would be in heaven.

My uniz is doing a weird thing with its websitez, it says I'm enrolled and then it says that I'm not enrolled. Coffee+panic (without the disco) is really an exceptional state. I'm going to chill and assume that everything will work itself out when staff return to work on the 7th. In the meantime, I withdrew from one of my previous subjects (no choice, it got cancelled for 2008) and took Philosophy instead. I'm catching up on my Socrates just as an intro to what I'll be studying, and it is all super exciting.